The Perpetual Prime Minister

Despite the parliamentary and governmental chaos, the coronation of Theresa May as Brexit Queen will be accomplished. Somehow, she will win her third meaningful vote. The DUP will be bribed to support her deal with cosmetic legal assurances concerning the backstop, and by the promise of extra cash – the latter being much the more persuasive. Jacob Rees-Mogg, the principled leader of the ERG, who had earlier described May’s deal as ‘the worst deal in history’, says he will follow the DUP’s lead. The sheep will follow his lead. May’s ‘my deal or no Brexit’ gambit – her blackmail – will have paid off. Brexit will be ‘delivered’, and the Conservative party saved. What a master of strategy she has proved to be!    

May will be hailed by Conservative MPs as the great leader who has pulled off a seemingly impossible feat. No-one will dare question her right to lead the party and take us forward, with Olly Robbins at her side, and lead us into the next round of trade negotiations – negotiations which will issue in ‘the closest possible relationship with our EU partners’. Naturally this will be at a price of the EU’s choosing – £39 billion was just the down-payment – but that is only to be expected. Very quickly, all talk of Brexit betrayal will be forgotten. The bribery and blackmail, the bare-faced deception, the parliamentary chaos, the national humiliation, will be excused. For Mrs May will have ‘delivered’ Brexit.

The pound will rebound. Hammond will announce a Brexit dividend, and, if she has any sense, May will seek an early election to reinforce her mandate. Despite the anger of conservative party members, who regard her deal as a betrayal and say they will never vote Conservative again, she is ahead in the polls, for Corbyn is her strongest asset. UKIP has destroyed itself as a political force. Brexiteers have nowhere to turn.    

In time, normality will be restored. Mass immigration will resume with renewed vigour. The EU will demand free movement as one of its conditions for concluding a trade deal. And why not? EU immigration helps feed our booming economy and fill our skills gaps. That the last set of figures showed non-EU immigration running at record levels tells us all we need to know about the government’s priorities. We will give away our fishing rights – the EU will demand this too as one of its conditions for concluding a trade deal. Hasn’t Macron already made this clear? In any case, who gives the toss about our coastal communities when there are the interests of foreign car manufacturers to consider. And, so it will go on.

Its not exactly Brexit, but as David Liddington, May’s trusted deputy, pronounced last week, those who voted leave in the referendum were really voting for ‘the closest possible relationship with the EU’. And this is what the government will have delivered.

Some will say that the English are not the people they once were. Our old Commonwealth friends are bemused at how a nation that fought on alone in 1940, that once ruled over  a great empire, could have sunk so low. But treatments will become available for Brexiteers – the Brexit extremists, the nationalists, the populists – to manage their anger, their sense of betrayal. Brexit anger will be diagnosed a pathological condition. And for those who do not respond to treatment, there is always the possibility of being convicted of hate crime. For no-one can doubt May’s commitment to social justice, inclusivity and diversity.

There is no doubt about it: Mrs May is the great deliverer.   


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6 Comments on The Perpetual Prime Minister

  1. ‘Our old Commonwealth friends are bemused at how a nation that fought on alone in 1940’

    How can anyone still believe this nonsense? Churchill undoubtedly made a very great and honourable decision to keep fighting Hitler in spite of most of the establishment pushing for negotiation with the Nazis. But this does not mean that Britain fought alone. We had enormous help from India, Oman, Australia, New Zealand, Canada, South Africa etc. This does not count as one nation standing alone.

    ‘Standing alone’ has become a national myth that has become an easy political trope to pull out at every opportunity. But it is a lie we tell ourselves. How many people realise that 90% of the casualties of the war were on the Eastern Front between Germany and Russia?

    Britain gave everything to the war. But the fact is we were not strong enough to win it on our own, and it was the Empire, now disbanded, and American and Russian (self-interested) help that meant that we were on the winning side. But even if we were on the winning side, the war bankrupted us and led to the break-up of our Empire – it was a moral victory but in actuality the war was a devastating loss for Britain.

    • Yes, we know all this. But it is beside the point. Britain did stand alone in 1940. Britain won the Battle of Britain and survived the Blitz. It really was ‘our finest hour’. And everything that followed, in the East and the West, depended on Britain not capitulating at this moment.

      After the German surrender, the Russians asked Field Marshal von Rundstedt ‘which battle he recognised as most decisive’. He replied, ‘The Battle of Britain’. They were not amused. Churchill also put it quite well: ‘Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few’.

      Debunkers talk of national myths, but as national myths go, there isn’t a better one. In ‘The Most Dangerous Enemy’, Stephen Bungay writes that in their finest hour, the British behaved quite differently from the way in which they usually portray themselves: ‘They exhibited a talent for planning and organisation which, in its Teutonic thoroughness, far outstripped that of the Germans’, but this was always tempered by values of mutual respect, teamwork, modesty, generosity and good humour, not least among the pilots themselves.

      True Brits should be proud of this episode in their national story.

  2. Wonderful, acerbic article. But, but… I hope Mr Miller is wrong. I cling to the belief that the English, when confronted with the abolition of democracy, will take up their pitchforks and march on Whitehall. The last time our democracy was threatened, we bombed civilians in German cities. Surely we are prepared to harangue and jostle a few politicians today?

    • Mr Weston: I fear that it’s too late. We’ve missed our chance. The instant somebody brandishes a pitchfork, the brandisher will be arrested and the sale of pitchforks will be banned; and we already know what will happen to anybody who harangues and jostles politicians, because it’s already happening to Mr James Goddard – though it mysteriously has never happened to those who harangue and jostle Mr Jacob Rees-Mogg. It’s not only the politicians who are against us, but also the police, the judges and (almost certainly) the army.

      Meanwhile, our beloved Home Secretary has announced his disgust about some broken windows in Birmingham. You might think that broken windows are beneath a Home Secretary’s notice, and you’d be right if they were the windows of an Englishman’s home or of an English church, but these windows belonged to mosques, which means that anybody who breaks them is deemed to be not a mere vandal but a terrorist.

      Give it a few years, and referring to a man who gets his kicks by pretending to be a woman as “he” instead of “she” will probably also be counted as terrorism. And it’s too late to stop it happening. Decades ago we gave the enemies of Western Civilisation an inch, and they’re now happily taking a yard (or a “metre”, as they require us to call it.)

  3. Yes, I suspect the ‘progressives and ‘globalists” have calculated that, in the end, they have a good shot at winning whatever the people think. And the people? Will they rouse themselves?

    But let us not entirely rule out a very British revolution in which the legacy parties are voted out. After all, their successors will be gifted a very valuable asset after a Brexit betrayal. For when they tell the people that under the current dispensation their votes count for nothing – how will they be gainsaid?

    Could it be that what finally unites our tribal voters is detestation of a treacherous establishment?